Every Wednesday, I find myself in a bit of a slump. The weekend feels just out of reach, and my motivation to work plummets. A friend suggested injecting humor into my Hump Day to alleviate the midweek blues. I decided to try it out and found that a good laugh can change everything. Whether at work or home, a little humor can lighten the mood. So, here are some jokes to help you conquer your own Hump Day challenges.
1. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose!
2. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
3. Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
4. How do bees get to school?
By school buzz!
5. What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta!
6. Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
7. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
8. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
9. What did one wall say to the other wall?
I’ll meet you at the corner!
10. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
11. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
12. What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?
Thunderwear!
13. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
14. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
15. How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
16. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite!
17. Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired!
18. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Supplies!
19. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese!
20. How does a cucumber become a pickle?
It goes through a jarring experience!
Classic Hump Day Jokes
1. Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged!
2. How do you organize a space party?
You planet!
3. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
4. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
5. Why did the golfer bring an extra ball?
In case he got a hole in one!
6. What do you call a snowy day without coffee?
A depresso!
7. Why was the belt arrested?
For holding up a pair of pants!
8. How did the barber win the race?
He knew all the shortcuts!
9. Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
10. What do you call a puppy that can do magic?
A labracadabrador!
11. Why did the man put his money in the blender?
Because he wanted to make some liquid assets!
12. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
Frostbite!
13. Why can’t you give Elsa from Frozen a balloon?
Because she will let it go!
14. What did the fish say when it hit the wall?
Dam!
15. Why are ghosts bad liars?
Because you can see right through them!
16. What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
17. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because it felt crummy!
18. How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a nut!
19. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
20. Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
All of the fans left!
Puns to Brighten Your Wednesday
1. Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
Because he had no body to go with him!
2. What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
3. Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
4. How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it!
5. What did one eye say to the other eye?
Between you and me, something smells!
6. Why did the math teacher bring a ladder?
To reach the high numbers!
7. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
You might think it’s R, but it’s the C that they love!
8. Why can’t you trust stairs?
Because they’re always up to something!
9. What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Frostbite!
10. Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs!
11. What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!
12. Why did the picture go to jail?
Because it was framed!
13. How do you organize a fantastic space party?
You planet, of course!
14. Why was the math book always worried?
It had too many problems!
15. What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An investigator!
16. Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired!
17. What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament?
Live stream!
18. Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
19. What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
20. Why did the golf ball go to the party?
Because it was a hole-in-one!
Lighthearted One-Liners
1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
2. What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus!
3. Why are elevator jokes so classic?
Because they work on many levels!
4. Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
5. How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
6. Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
Because they might crack up!
7. What did one plate say to the other plate?
Dinner’s on me!
8. Why did the bee get married?
Because he found his honey!
9. What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
10. Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
11. How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a nut!
12. Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
13. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
14. What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house?
The living room!
15. Why don’t we ever tell secrets on a farm?
Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!
16. Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged!
17. What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
18. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
19. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese!
20. How does a cucumber become a pickle?
It goes through a jarring experience!
Work-Related Hump Day Laughs
1. Why did the employee bring a ladder to work?
Because they heard the job was up-and-coming!
2. How does a computer get drunk?
It takes screenshots!
3. Why was the office mouse so good at his job?
He always had a great whiteboard!
4. What did the employee say when he asked for a raise?
I’m not just here for the “pennies”!
5. Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
6. Why don’t we ever tell secrets on a farm?
Because the corn has ears and the potatoes have eyes!
7. How does a lawyer greet their clients?
“Let’s get this case cracking!”
8. Why did the manager bring a map to the meeting?
To keep things on track!
9. What do you call a boss who tells jokes?
A “pun”-derful leader!
10. Why did the calendar apply for a job?
It wanted to turn over a new leaf!
11. What did one elevator say to the other?
“I think I’m coming down with something!”
12. What do you call a well-dressed man on a unicycle?
A one-man band!
13. Why did the computer go to the therapy session?
It had a lot of bytes of baggage!
14. How do trees access the internet?
They log in!
15. Why did the business person bring a pencil to work?
In case they had to draw up some plans!
16. Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged on its way to work!
17. How do you organize a fantastic work party?
You just have to team up!
18. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the office party?
He had no body to go with!
19. Why did the banker switch careers?
He lost interest!
20. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
Family-Friendly Hump Day Jokes
1. Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
Because he wanted to go to high school!
2. What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
3. Why did the cookie go to school?
Because it wanted to be a smart cookie!
4. How do you organize a space party for kids?
You planet with fun activities!
5. Why was the broom late to class?
It swept in at the last minute!
6. What do you call a funny vegetable?
A funny-plant!
7. Why don’t scientists trust atoms around kids?
Because they make up everything, especially stories!
8. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus!
9. Why did the student eat his homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
10. How do you make a lemon drop?
Just let it fall!
11. What did the teacher say to the student who was reading a book on anti-gravity?
“That’s impossible to put down!”
12. Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems to solve!
13. How do you catch a squirrel in school?
Climb a tree and act like a nut with a pencil!
14. Why did the selfie go to school?
To improve its “picture”-taking skills!
15. What did the chalk say to the blackboard?
“You complete me!”
16. Why did the kid bring string to class?
To tie up loose ends!
17. What do you call a pencil that’s never naughty?
A ruler!
18. Why was the computer cold in class?
Because it left its Windows open!
19. How do trees get in touch with their kids?
They “root” for them!
20. Why did the kid sit on his homework?
He wanted to make it a real seat of learning!
Hump Day Jokes for Friends
1. Why did the friend bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
2. What do you call a group of musical friends?
A buddy band!
3. Why did the bicycle fall over when it was with friends?
Because it was two-tired of standing still!
4. What did the friend say after winning the lottery?
“I guess I’m buying dinner for all of us!”
5. Why don’t friends play hide and seek?
Because good luck hiding when you have a loud laugh!
6. What do you call two friends who love gardening?
Best buds!
7. Why did the potato break up with the friend?
Because it found someone a-peeling!
8. What did one friend say to the other at the comedy show?
“I’m here for the punchlines, not the crime!”
9. How do friends greet each other at the beach?
With a wave and a smile!
10. Why did the tomato turn red when with friends?
Because it saw a salad dressing party!
11. What do you call a group of surprising friends?
A shock squad!
12. Why do friends make great comedians?
Because they know how to punch up the humor!
13. How do friends stay in shape?
They run around in circles of laughter!
14. What did one light bulb say to its friends?
“You brighten my day!”
15. Why did the friends all sit on the clock?
To have a good time!
16. What’s a friend’s favorite game?
“Guess Who?” because they know each other well!
17. Why did the friend want to work at the bakery?
Because they kneaded the dough!
18. How do friends resolve arguments?
They “talk it out” over some coffee!
19. What do you call friends who make cookies together?
Baked buddies!
20. Why did the friend bring a pencil to dinner?
To draw up some great conversations!
Knock-Knock Hump Day Jokes
1. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, it’s freezing out here!
2. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You’re welcome!
3. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Bless you!
4. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you, and I miss you!
5. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Disguise.
Disguise who?
Disguise me, I’m no good at knock-knock jokes!
6. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes a really bad joke!
7. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Wanda.
Wanda who?
Wanda go get ice cream?
8. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad it’s Hump Day?
9. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!
10. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cereal.
Cereal who?
Cereal-sly, let me in already!
11. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Taco.
Taco who?
Taco ’bout a good joke!
12. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Nobel.
Nobel who?
No bell, that’s why I knocked!
13. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up, it’s time for lunch!
14. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Butter.
Butter who?
Butter let me in before it’s too late!
15. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the suitcase, you load up the car!
16. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup with me, let’s go out!
17. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You’re welcome – again!
18. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Amaryllis.
Amaryllis who?
Amaryllis in the middle of a joke!
19. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
I already told you, don’t cry!
20. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Flower.
Flower who?
Flower power on Hump Day!
Hump Day Jokes to Share on Social Media
1. Why did the football team go to the bank?
Because they wanted to get their quarterback!
2. What do you call a bear with no ear?
B!
3. Why can’t you trust an atom?
Because they make up everything!
4. How do you organize a space party?
You planet!
5. Why did the picture go to jail?
It was framed!
6. Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
7. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese!
8. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
9. What did one wall say to the other wall?
I’ll meet you at the corner!
10. What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
11. What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
12. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
13. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
14. How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
15. Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired!
16. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
17. Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
18. Why was the belt arrested?
For holding up a pair of pants!
19. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
20. How does a cucumber become a pickle?
It goes through a jarring experience!
How to Create Your Own Hump Day Humor
Creating your own Hump Day humor can be a refreshing way to lighten up the midweek monotony. To kickstart your creativity, think about your everyday experiences and how they could be spun into a joke. Start with a simple premise or situation you find amusing. Consider puns, wordplay, or even situations that you or your friends find relatable. Here are some jokes that might spark your inspiration:
1. Why did the coffee file a police report?
Because it got mugged!
2. How do you organize a space party?
You planet!
3. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
4. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
5. Why did the golfer bring an extra ball?
In case he got a hole in one!
6. What do you call a snowy day without coffee?
A depresso!
7. Why was the belt arrested?
For holding up a pair of pants!
8. How did the barber win the race?
He knew all the shortcuts!
9. Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
10. What do you call a puppy that can do magic?
A labracadabrador!
11. Why did the man put his money in the blender?
Because he wanted to make some liquid assets!
12. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
Frostbite!
13. Why can’t you give Elsa from Frozen a balloon?
Because she will let it go!
14. What did the fish say when it hit the wall?
Dam!
15. Why are ghosts bad liars?
Because you can see right through them!
16. What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
17. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because it felt crummy!
18. How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a nut!
19. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
20. Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
All of the fans left!