Ever had one of those days where you just needed a good laugh? I remember my friend and I were trying to lighten the mood during a long dive lesson. Somehow, we drifted into the realm of submarine jokes between practicing our buoyancy and adjusting our masks. It turned out that laughter really is the best dive buddy! Here are some buoyant quips to keep you afloat in humor:
1. Why did the submarine break up with its partner?
It couldn’t handle the pressure!
2. How do submarines communicate?
Through deep-tweets!
3. What do you call a submarine that tells jokes?
A pun-bine!
4. Why did the captain bring a ladder on the submarine?
To reach new depths of humor!
5. What did one torpedo say to the other?
“Ready, aim, laugh!”
6. Why don’t submarines play cards?
Because they can’t handle the deck!
7. What’s a submarine’s favorite music genre?
Underwater hip-hop!
8. Why did the fish always invite the submarine to parties?
Because it brought the depth of fun!
9. How do you know when a submarine is lying?
It’s being totally surface-level!
10. What did the ocean say to the submarine?
Nothing, it just waved!
11. What’s a submarine’s favorite dessert?
Anything that’s deep-fried!
12. Why did the submarine apply for a job?
It wanted to dive into the workforce!
13. How do submarines stay organized?
They use sub-folders!
14. What kind of jokes do submarines love?
Witty sonar puns!
15. Why do submarines hate math?
Because they can’t stand the divisions!
16. What did the submarine say to the diver?
“Stop trying to go overboard with your jokes!”
17. How do submarines ensure they don’t forget anything?
They keep it on their ‘sub” list!
18. What do you get when you cross a submarine with a shark?
A vessel with a bite!
19. Why don’t submarines get lost?
They always follow their sonar instincts!
20. What do submarines and comedians have in common?
They both do well under pressure!
History of Submarine Humor
Throughout history, the art of humor has found its way into every nook and cranny, including the depths of the oceans. Submarine humor emerged as a unique way for sailors and submariners to cope with the stresses of underwater life. During long deployments, these small communities would lighten the mood with wisecracks, fostering camaraderie among crew members. Just as submarines can dive deep, their jokes dug deep into the essence of humor, forever intertwining bravery with buoyancy. Here are some historical quips that have sailed through the ages:
1. How did the first submarine joke go?
“Just keep it submerged and hope it surfaces later!”
2. Why couldn’t the skeleton pilot the submarine?
Because it didn’t have the guts for it!
3. What did the submarine captain say when he told his first joke?
“Dive right in; the humor’s great down here!”
4. Why did they stop using wooden submarines?
They kept sinking under pressure!
5. What did the crew do with ancient submarine jokes?
They archived them to avoid sub-par humor!
6. How did the first submariners send messages?
By passing notes in sealed envelopes – no surface gossip allowed!
7. What do you call a submarine from the 1800s?
A diving relic with jokes that don’t always float!
8. Why was the sub captain known for his poetry?
He always knew how to rhyme under the waves!
9. What did the old-timey submariner say to the new recruits?
“Get ready, we’re going to dive into laughter!”
10. Why was the submarine’s comic strip always a hit?
Because it had layers—just like the ocean!
11. What’s the most famous submarine joke of all time?
“Why did the sub get hired for movie roles? It could always go below the surface!”
12. How did submariners celebrate a good joke back in the day?
With a toast of deep-sea brew under the hull!
13. Why was early submarine humor always dark?
Because they had no lights on the interior!
14. What’s a good nautical term for a bad joke?
A “flop-torpedo”!
15. How did submariners keep morale high during long missions?
With nightly storytelling sessions featuring subpar puns!
16. Why did the historian love submarine jokes?
They were often deep and thought-provoking!
17. What did one submarine say to the other at the historical reenactment?
“Time to dive back into the past!”
18. How are old submarine jokes like the ocean?
They both have countless depths to explore!
19. What type of humor was popular in early sub crews?
Waterlogged witticisms!
20. Why did humorists prefer writing jokes for submarines?
Because they always went under the radar!
Types of Submarines in Jokes
Submarines come in many shapes and sizes, each with unique traits that lend themselves to some clever jokes. Whether it’s a tiny research sub or a giant military vessel, there’s something for everyone in these gags. Picture this: you’re on a sub with a bunch of friends, and after a long day under the waves, you want to bring a smile to their faces. That’s where these jokes dive in! Here are some delightful jokes focusing on the types of submarines that truly embrace the spirit of underwater humor:
1. What do you call a mini-submarine that loves to party?
A fun-derwater cruiser!
2. Why was the research submarine so popular?
Because it was full of great ideas that were way ahead of the current!
3. How do you spot a stealth submarine at a party?
It’s the one that’s blending perfectly in with the background noise!
4. Why did the military submarine break up with its girlfriend?
She didn’t appreciate its need for space—underwater space!
5. What’s a ballistic submarine’s favorite workout?
Cannonball exercises!
6. Why did the tourist opt for a tourist submarine?
Because they wanted to dive deep into their vacation!
7. What did the research sub say to the military sub at the bar?
“Let’s keep it low-key and not go into combat mode!”
8. Why was the personal sub always so calm?
Because it was well anchored in its own thoughts!
9. What type of submarine likes to tell scary stories?
The ghost sub, it haunts your dreams underwater!
10. Why do experimental submarines never play poker?
They always experiment with their ‘bluffing’!
11. What did the tourist say about the glass-bottom submarine?
“It really gives you a whole new perspective on life!”
12. How does a stealth submarine order food?
“In silence, so it can dive right into the tasty bits!”
13. What did the luxury submarine say to its guests?
“Welcome aboard! Prepare for a voyage into the lap of luxury!”
14. Why did the deep-sea exploration sub get kicked out of the club?
It couldn’t follow the surface rules!
15. What’s a drink favorite on a research sub?
Deep-sea smoothies!
16. Why love the tourist submarine so much?
Because it’s a great way to experience the deep without getting wet!
17. What did the large naval sub say to the small research sub?
“Size doesn’t matter, as long as we both float in humor!”
18. How do submarines throw a birthday party?
They dive right into the festivities!
19. What’s the best gift for a submarine lover?
A personalized sonar system that plays their favorite tunes!
20. Why don’t you ever invite a ballistic submarine on a picnic?
Because they always bring too much firepower!
Classic Submarine One-Liners
1. Why did the submarine join a band?
It wanted to play deep notes!
2. What did the submarine say when it passed a floating restaurant?
“Is that a surface-level buffet?”
3. Why do submarines always carry a map?
To avoid going off course while cracking jokes!
4. How does a submarine stay in shape?
By doing underwater squats!
5. What did the sub say to the dolphin?
“Stop flapping around, I’m trying to dive into a good joke!”
6. Why don’t submarines ever get hungry?
They’re always full of gas!
7. What did the captain say when the sub got a compliment?
“I’m just trying to stay below your expectations!”
8. How do submarines write their comedy scripts?
By brainstorming below the surface!
9. Why did the submarine go to therapy?
It had trouble with deep-seated issues!
10. What do you call a submarine that can’t stop laughing?
A giggle-bine!
11. How do submarines avoid awkward silence?
They use sonar banter!
12. What did the sub say after a long dive?
“I’m feeling a little pressure-driven!”
13. Why was the submarine such a great comedian?
It knew how to go deep with its punchlines!
14. Why did the sub refuse to tell a long joke?
It didn’t want to sink the mood!
15. What do you call a submarine with self-esteem issues?
A sub below sea level!
16. How does a submarine celebrate a successful mission?
With a splash party!
17. Why did the submarine never play hide and seek?
Because it always got detected!
18. What’s a submarine’s favorite game?
Deep-sea charades!
19. Why did the submarine bring a camera?
To capture all the deep moments!
20. What did the submarine say after a good day?
“I really dove into some great laughs today!”
Puns That Make Waves
1. Why did the ocean break up with the river?
Because it found someone deeper!
2. How do you make a fish laugh?
Just tell it a pun that’s off the scale!
3. What did the crab say to the shrimp?
“Stop being so shellfish!”
4. Why are fish so bad at basketball?
They always travel when they get caught!
5. What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
6. Why aren’t fish good guitarists?
They always get caught in the net!
7. What did the seaweed say to the ocean?
“Stop waving at me!”
8. Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the other tide!
9. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
10. Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
11. What do you get when you cross a fish and an elephant?
Swimming trunks that never forget!
12. How do fish always know how much they weigh?
Because they have scales!
13. Why did the fisherman put his money in the blender?
He wanted to make some liquid assets!
14. What did the fisherman say to the fish?
“Keep calm and scale on!”
15. Why do fish always know how to play poker?
They can read the cards with their fins!
16. What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
Fish and ships!
17. Why are underwater comedians so successful?
They always know how to keep it deep!
18. What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall?
“Dam!”
19. What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved!
20. How do you catch a school of fish?
With a book about fishing!
Submarine Jokes for Kids
1. What do you call a school of fish that tells jokes?
A pun-derwater class!
2. Why did the little fish start telling jokes?
Because it wanted to be a little fin-ny!
3. How do you organize a party in the ocean?
You “shell” out the invites!
4. What do you call an underwater comedian?
A sea-sational entertainer!
5. Why did the octopus get a job at the library?
Because it was great at handling multiple books at once!
6. What did the fish say when it hit a wall?
“Dam!”
7. Why did the shark go on a diet?
It wanted to lose a few pounds of “blubber”!
8. What happens when a fish gets a diploma?
It becomes a little “school”-er!
9. Why are fish so smart?
Because they swim in schools!
10. What did the fish wear to impress its date?
Its best “scales”!
11. How do you know fish are good dancers?
They know all the best “fin” moves!
12. What do you call a fish that plays the piano?
A tuna-fish!
13. Why did the clam stop sharing?
Because it was tired of being “clammed” up!
14. What did the fisherman say to the fish?
“Let’s make a reel good catch!”
15. Why did the fishes always carry a pen?
To draw their own schools!
16. How does a fish keep up with current events?
It reads the “fin”-ancial news!
17. Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
18. What did one fish say to another during a math test?
“Let’s scale back on the worries!”
19. Why don’t fish like sharing their food?
Because they are “net”-working!
20. How do fish get their exercise?
They go for “swim” runs!
Nautical Nonsense and Laughs
Navigating through the ocean of laughs can feel like swimming against the current, but the silliness of underwater antics keeps everyone buoyant. Each joke is a little morsel of joy that can surface at the most unexpected moments. Dive into these nautical nonsense jokes, and let the bubbles of laughter rise to the top!
1. What did the ocean say to the submarine?
Nothing, it just waved!
2. Why did the fish sit on the piano?
Because it wanted to play a tune underwater!
3. What did the crab use to surf the internet?
A shellphone!
4. Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
5. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
You’d think it’s “R,” but it’s the “C” they love!
6. Why don’t sharks like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it!
7. What do you call a fish with a bowtie?
Sofar fish-ticated!
8. Why did the octopus break up with the squid?
It found a better catch with more arms!
9. What do you call a fish that makes music?
A bass guitar fish!
10. Why was the underwater explorer always calm?
Because he had a buoyant personality!
11. What did the fish say when it lost its job?
“I’m going to have to scale back!”
12. How do fish always know how much they weigh?
Because they have scales!
13. What do you call fish who love to play cards?
A card shark!
14. Why was the marine biologist such a great musician?
Because he had perfect pitch under the sea!
15. What does a fish say when it bumps into a concrete wall?
“Dam!”
16. How does a school of fish stay in touch?
They use “fin”-ternet communication!
17. Why do fish never tell secrets?
Because they’re afraid of the eels eavesdropping!
18. What’s a fish’s favorite instrument?
The bassoon!
19. Why was the deep-sea divers’ party so successful?
Because they had a blast with wave music!
20. What did the fish say when it won a race?
“I’m feeling fin-tastic!”
Underwater Silly Situations
1. What did the fish say to the pillow?
“Are you feeling flat or just a little stuffed?”
2. Why did the dolphin bring a towel to the party?
To dry off the jokes that were too wet!
3. What do you call a fish that loves to play hide and seek?
A sneakfish!
4. Why did the octopus get a promotion?
Because it had a lot of “hands” on experience!
5. How do underwater animals communicate?
They use fish-speak, and it’s quite the gill-ful exchange!
6. What did the jellyfish say to the shrimp?
“Stop being such a prawn, let’s have a laugh!”
7. Why don’t clams ever share their food?
Because they are always feeling a little “shellfish”!
8. What do you call an educated fish?
A “well-gilled” creature!
9. How did the fish get back to work after a vacation?
It swam through the current currents!
10. Why did the clown fish join a circus?
It wanted to show off its “fin-tastic” tricks!
11. What do you get when you cross an octopus with a prankster?
A joke-tapus!
12. Why did the sea cucumber never get invited to hang out?
Because it was too “sea-rapy” for most friends!
13. What did the fish do when it won the lottery?
It bought a “reel” nice house!
14. How do fish like their sandwiches?
With a little “tuna” and a lot of “fin”-ishing touches!
15. Why did the shark always look up to its friends?
Because they had great ideas swimming around!
16. What did one fish say to the other in the morning?
“Are you ready to make a splash today?”
17. Why are crabs bad at sharing?
Because they can’t let anything go without a pinch!
18. What’s a fish’s favorite game?
“Catch and release—hilarious edition!”
19. How do fish feel when they tell jokes?
They get a little “fin”ny and bubbly!
20. Why was the ocean always so well-prepared?
Because it knew how to surf through any humor wave!
Submariners’ Favorites
1. What do submariners use to show they care?
A “sub”stantial amount of love!
2. Why did the submarine throw a party?
To celebrate its dive-ine humor!
3. What did the submariner say when asked about their favorite joke?
“It’s still underwater; I’m waiting for it to surface!”
4. How do submariners greet each other?
With a little wave and a big splash of laughter!
5. Why did the captain always bring a blanket on board?
To stay cozy while diving into the humor!
6. What do submariners prefer when it comes to music?
Anything that hits the “deep” notes!
7. Why did the submarine apply for a grant?
To fund its “undersea” art projects!
8. How do submariners keep their spirits high?
With a buoyant sense of humor that never sinks!
9. What’s a submariner’s favorite way to unwind?
With a good book that’s full of depth!
10. Why don’t submariners ever feel lonely?
Because they’re always surrounded by “crew-fully” funny mates!
11. What did the submariner say after a good laugh?
“Now that really took me below the surface!”
12. How do submariners lighten the mood during long dives?
With a repertoire of dive-tastic jokes!
13. Why did the submariner always carry a pencil?
In case they needed to draw some funny conclusions!
14. What do submariners say when the humor runs deep?
“Let’s dive deeper into this joke!”
15. Why did the submariner become a motivational speaker?
They knew how to surf through challenges with humor!
16. How do submariners stay updated on jokes?
They tune into the “sub”-marine frequencies!
17. What’s a submariner’s favorite type of exercise?
Snorkel squats—good for the lungs and the laughs!
18. Why did the submariner love telling stories?
Because it added layers to their life under the waves!
19. What do you call a group of hilarious submariners?
A guided tour of laughs under the sea!
20. Why did the submariner join the comedy club?
To make sure the laughs always floated to the top!
Deep-Sea Dad Jokes
1. Why did the dad submarine always carry a pencil?
In case he needed to draw some “a-sail-ments!”
2. What did the submarine dad say to his kids when they were fighting?
“Calm down, or I’ll send you to your ‘sub-vacation’!”
3. How do you cheer up a sad submarine dad?
Tell him to dive into a good book!
4. Why did the submarine dad bring a ladder to work?
To reach new ‘depths’ of success!
5. What’s a submarine dad’s favorite game on family game night?
“Dive-tastic Monopoly!”
6. Why did the submarine dad always tell knock-knock jokes?
Because he loved seeing who was ‘sub’-bed in for laughter!
7. How does a submarine dad keep track of his kids?
With sonar GPS—“Great Parenting System!”
8. Why did the submarine dad love camping?
He could finally sleep below the stars in ‘sub-mersible’ style!
9. What did the submarine dad say after telling a joke?
“Let’s ‘sea’ if you can handle more!”
10. Why did the submarine dad always carry an extra snack?
In case someone was ‘fisher’ hungry!
11. How does a submarine dad celebrate a win?
With a big splash at the family pool!
12. What’s a submarine dad’s favorite dance move?
The “splash and be-tween!”
13. Why did the submarine dad start telling bedtime stories?
To make sure his kids had dreams that went ‘deep’!
14. What did the submarine dad say when asked about his weekend?
“I had a ‘deep’ and meaningful time!”
15. Why did the submarine dad become a chef?
To cook up ‘fin-tastic’ meals for the family!
16. How does a submarine dad help with school projects?
He dives right into the research!
17. Why did the submarine dad join the book club?
To check out the “sub-stance” of good reads!
18. What did the submarine dad say during a family photo?
“Let’s all ‘dive’ into this moment!”
19. How does a submarine dad deal with household chores?
He ‘bubbles’ up the motivation!
20. Why did the submarine dad become an artist?
Because he always wanted to express himself through ‘deep’ creativity!
How to Tell a Submarine Joke
1. Why did the submarine joke get lost?
Because it took a wrong turn at the deep end!
2. How do submariners tell each other secrets?
They keep it below the surface!
3. What did the submarine say after a funny story?
“Now that’s sub-ly amusing!”
4. Why did the captain turn off the lights?
To keep the jokes from floating to the surface!
5. What’s a submarine’s favorite type of currency?
Deep-sea dollars!
6. Why did the submarine visit the doctor?
It couldn’t stop sinking into laughter!
7. How do submarines prefer their coffee?
Deep brewed!
8. What do you call a funny story told underwater?
A wet joke!
9. Why was the submarine always calm?
It knew how to dive into peaceful waters!
10. How do submariners show appreciation?
With a good ol’ belly laugh!
11. What did the diver say when he heard a bad joke?
“That one was below sea level!”
12. Why do submariners love physics?
Because it’s all about the buoyancy of laughter!
13. What do you call an underwater comedy show?
A splashing success!
14. How does a submarine start a conversation?
With a joke to set the depth!
15. Why did the submarine joke fail?
It had too many ups and downs!
16. What did the ocean say after hearing a great joke?
“That’s worth a wave of laughter!”
17. How do underwater comedians plan their sets?
By diving deep into their material!
18. What’s a submarine’s favorite sport?
Undersea football, where the jokes always land!
19. Why did the submarine avoid telling long stories?
It didn’t want to run out of air!
20. What do you call it when a submarine tells a joke?
A comedy dive!